Part I. South America v. The American South
I never realized how Southern I was until I lived in China for 10 months. When I was in New York I knew it was different where I came form, but at the end of the day I was never questioned past alligators, country music and Duck Dynasty. When it was all said and done, I was still in America, and although life north of the Mason-Dixon is different from south of it, it was mostly just accents, foods and hobbies. People in the north hunt, fish and ride four-wheelers, too. They also like BBQ and fried catfish.
In China I'm not only surrounded by Chinese culture, but all the different cultures my friends from all over the world have. Religions, holidays, and traditions are just the basics. I knew these things would be fairly different and new between myself and even my other native English speaking friends. What I never realized was all of the things I would need to explain to other English speakers. They usually understand the basic idea of what I was saying but not always.
A list of a few things that are part of a southerner's daily life, common childhood or upbringing that are far less common to the rest of the world:
1. Trailers (mobile homes). And definitely not a trailer park.
2 Wranglers and tight-fittin' jeans (and we ain't talkin skinny jeans)
3. Manners - "mamns" and "sirs" are not common among anyone outside of the South. The smallest thing like a smile is not common among by passers. When I walk the streets here, I can always tell the difference in an American and European foreigner.
4. I've had to explain the word "y'all" to more tun just Chinese friends... And "wedgie" and "buggy." And more...
5. It's apparently not normal to never wear shoes. At work they call me the "barefoot blue jean princess." They understand now, but in the beginning it really freaked them out.
6. The only tea these people know is hot, and herbal.
7. Dancing. Everyone can pop, lock and drop it, but you'll never two-step outside of the American South. Teaching is out of the questions
8. I live with two guys. We had a small roach problem for a while (literally the roaches were small). They used the spray and panicked, meanwhile, I'm slappin' my hand down every chance I got. Once my roommate came back with the spray asking' where the bug went and I pointed to the sink. :)
9. Food... Explaining every dish, and blowing their minds every time.
10. The worst is the music barrier. People from the UK tend to know Lady Antebellum an Taylor Swift, the pop side of country. But, no one knows George Strait or Miranda Lambert. And they damn sure don't know Hag, Jennings or Jones, and every time you hear, "who's that?" your soul breaks just a bit.
There are dozens more I could go on about, but then it just gets sad.
3. Manners - "mamns" and "sirs" are not common among anyone outside of the South. The smallest thing like a smile is not common among by passers. When I walk the streets here, I can always tell the difference in an American and European foreigner.
4. I've had to explain the word "y'all" to more tun just Chinese friends... And "wedgie" and "buggy." And more...
5. It's apparently not normal to never wear shoes. At work they call me the "barefoot blue jean princess." They understand now, but in the beginning it really freaked them out.
6. The only tea these people know is hot, and herbal.
7. Dancing. Everyone can pop, lock and drop it, but you'll never two-step outside of the American South. Teaching is out of the questions
8. I live with two guys. We had a small roach problem for a while (literally the roaches were small). They used the spray and panicked, meanwhile, I'm slappin' my hand down every chance I got. Once my roommate came back with the spray asking' where the bug went and I pointed to the sink. :)
9. Food... Explaining every dish, and blowing their minds every time.
10. The worst is the music barrier. People from the UK tend to know Lady Antebellum an Taylor Swift, the pop side of country. But, no one knows George Strait or Miranda Lambert. And they damn sure don't know Hag, Jennings or Jones, and every time you hear, "who's that?" your soul breaks just a bit.
There are dozens more I could go on about, but then it just gets sad.
II. Returning home
"Home is where the heart is."
This quote seems to be the starter for many of my blogs.
When I was in the airport trying to leave Shreveport, Louisiana, my hometown, I asked Mother Nature to hold off on the rain and storms because I was trying to go home.
But, I was already home. Wasn't I?
My heart undoubtedly remains eternally in the South. As it should. This is where I was born and raised after all. However, nowadays my heart resides in China with my fellow foreign family, the coworkers who put up with me daily and of course, my kids!
My boss warned me in the beginning not to settle in China. The moment things became a habit I had settled and she feared I'd never leave and continue pushing myself toward other, possibly greater, things.
Although China is the greatest accomplishment of my life and it has been a steady case of pushing an elephant up a hill, I understood what she meant.
I left my students for three weeks and it was hard. When I returned fellow teachers were telling me how much the students missed me, asked for me and one who cried three Mondays in a row because she wanted teacher Amie. This made my heart melt, but I still realized they made it without me. I can mold them and push them as far as I can, but eventually they grow up, too. Two of my younger classes graduate this month to a two-hour time slot, and being I have a full schedule, this leaves me with no slot to teach them further. This is a real heart breaker for me, but it allowed me a moment of clarity. If I stabilize myself here I wouldn't be the person I aspire to be.
Year two in China will be a greater challenge because I know it's ending. Also this trip requires 14 months. I know that I need to push further and harder toward a different future.
I also know China will forever hold a place in my heart as a second home. This is my home of discovery. I found a love and respect for myself as well as my actual hometown that I lacked before. China was a major transition of language, culture, customs and habits. I found the me I was looking for here through all the struggles I endured.
When you struggle and the only option is to endure, (because failure is never an option), you are stronger and wiser for it. I am a teacher, with no qualifications other than the fact I was born with white skin and English as my native language, but daily, I learn more than I teach. From my co-workers, foreign friends, my students and strangers. I live in a different world and am exposed to new language, history, experiences and culture daily. Living in a different culture you need to be on your toes more. More aware of your surroundings and landmarks. Aware of your behavior and actions. Because of this, I learn from myself. I'm steadily piecing together pieces of the language on my own and collecting context clues to learn on my own. When immersed it's amazing how quickly you can adapt.
III. When I leave this place...
The thing I lack most is patience and I think in some aspect we all lack the proper amount. This lifestyle I have begun to live, although more carefree, still consists of worries.
I know what to do next, but my problem is waiting it out. It's instilled in us to always work toward the future. I'm at the point in life now where I realize what the older generations meant about "later may never come." This is unfortunately true, yet, I've just now decided that if later never comes, whatever I said I'd do later must have never been something I was supposed to do.
I want to be successful and in my mind I already am. Is there always more to accomplish? Of course! But I'm not going to wear myself ragged trying to get there and miss out on all the little things.
My daddy has always told me time flies and this year was the first time I've noticed. I can already feel my body getting weaker physically, I can't ever get enough sleep to fill the bags under my eyes and I'll be silver-haired by 33 at the rate I'm headed.
Living abroad time is at an accelerated speed. Although the pace among Chinese is comparable to the tortoise I still find myself at hare speed because I'm constantly trying to keep up. I'm trying to learn, apply and obtain as much of the language as possible. I'm also trying to become more and more independent (mostly because that's the only option).
If I can do these things in a foreign country, there is no reason for me not to succeed in my own. The problem is, it's easier here. There are constant opportunities for people. And speaking English in a developing country is a huge bonus. You constantly get approached by people on the subway or in restaurants who would buy you dinner just to have an English conversation.
If I lost my job here today, I could have a new one before day's end. Networking is important here, but not as helpful as being a white American, native English speaker. Meanwhile, back in America, people are struggling daily to even get an interview.
Many people get stuck here because of this, but this is where I draw the line. Who wants a life too easy anyway? Bring on the challenge!
If I can do these things in a foreign country, there is no reason for me not to succeed in my own. The problem is, it's easier here. There are constant opportunities for people. And speaking English in a developing country is a huge bonus. You constantly get approached by people on the subway or in restaurants who would buy you dinner just to have an English conversation.
If I lost my job here today, I could have a new one before day's end. Networking is important here, but not as helpful as being a white American, native English speaker. Meanwhile, back in America, people are struggling daily to even get an interview.
Many people get stuck here because of this, but this is where I draw the line. Who wants a life too easy anyway? Bring on the challenge!
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