Those who can, teach...

I was watching a movie the other night and the guy (a bit of a jerk) says to his friend, who'd just accepted a teaching job, "those who can, do and those who can't, teach."
This may be a bit of a biased blog but I'd like to point out a few flaws in that statement. I know it's just a movie, but it's been said in real life many times.
I think whoever originally said this statement of complete and utter bullshit meant to say, "teachers teach and do a hell of a lot more than I ever could." 
But actually, the quote is from a George Bernard Shaw drama, "Man and Superman." In the play it's used to encourage a student who received a harsh feedback from a teacher. We've all been there. Until late, I never realized why certain teachers were more harsh than others. As a teacher, I can now understand this. You truly do see your students' potential and abilities, so it's frustrating when they don't apply themselves.
First, teaching is a lot of doing. If I can get my students to correctly apply all learned language in a functional sentence, I have done a lot.
If my students can explain something above their language level simply by trying, I've done something by nurturing them through their less confident days.
My favorite professor in college had a book published, constantly busted her ass writing essays and blogs, was involved in writing communities, constantly guided her students in a million different directions. Oh, and she was a mother of four who got her doctorate while raising them. My other professor has lived in every possible state and worked for every possible news publication, and another worked in Washington, DC. So please, don't ever say a teacher teaches and doesn't do. 
I wasn't a teacher when I came to China, and when I leave here, I may never step foot in another classroom for the remainder of my existence. But I will, forever be a teacher. I've got the gray hairs and caffeine addiction to prove it.
If I can maintain my students' attention for an entire class period, I feel like Spartacus after battle. When I can make it through an entire class period without "raising my voice," I did something. When I have 500 paper cuts in a day from cutting tiny pieces of paper for class preparation I've done something. (Don't laugh, cause y'all know a paper cut can feel like amputation).
In school, I was the chatter box who always got in trouble for talking in class. And we all had those teachers who got dead silent for five minutes and asked if we were finished talking or not. Gah, those teachers annoyed me... And now that's me. I understand the struggle now and I apologize again to my former teachers. I keep coloring sheets on hand to avoid fits of rage. Rather than raise my voice and attempt discipline in a foreign tongue, I just throw out the markers and the kids dive in like a piñata just busted.
It took me six months to train my students, but I finally did it. People are right when they say kids smell fear. They also smell anger, exhaustion and caffeine overload. My kids, even the youngest, just like my friends, can tell my mood by my disposition when I walk in the classroom. Does this mean they're angels every time? One could only hope... At the end of the day, they still love me, and I them. They're not old enough to understand a lot of things, but I think they understand I'm not angry at them. Disappointed or annoyed maybe, but never angry. They're just kids. My job is to do, and do it the best I can, and in the best way for my kids.
Lastly, don't say I don't do as a teacher when for the next six weeks I have one day off and will be working 12 hours a day. My old roommates, who teach adults, made a joke once that all I do is dance and play games. I still haven't let them live that down. 
To my teachers who work summer school, serve as sponsors for clubs and sports teams. For the field trips, after school tutoring and anything extra, don't ever let someone tell you you don't do!I think many teachers did so much prior to teaching, and only want to continue to do. They know what it's like to do, and how difficult it is to reach, and simply want to pass that ambition, motivation and encouragement onto their students. At least I know that's why I do it. I sometimes feel the hardest thing to do, in teaching and life in general, is to encourage someone enough that they see the greatness others see in them. We're all a bit guilty of that, aren't we? :)  

 

          

Mizpah

I. Dedication
Bobbers,
This one is for you, on your 26th birthday. May the year turn around and be the best one of your life. I told you I couldn't write you a blog, but I suppose I can in a way. After all, you're the inspiration behind this one. It's not solely about you, but I will dedicate it to you in your honor because that's the least I can do on your day of birth. 
Anyone who has the pleasure (or honor) to call you a friend needn't read about your magnificent qualities in words written by little ol' me because I promise they are aware of each and every greatness you possess. 
You've been a rescuer to me many times. From physically coming to drive me home when drunk at the bar in college or giving me the inspirational pep talks you do lately; you're a true pal, kid. 
Since the beginning, I've seen your kind heart. And aside from my dad, I've known few men with a heart as golden as yours. I truly believe you're one of the world's greatest people and I forever hope your shoulder will always be there for my tears, and that my "honest" words can be there for you. I'll close before getting too sappy with one of my favorite quotes. In the words of S.E. Hinton, via Johnny Cade, "Stay golden, Ponyboy." ;) 
All my love,
Ames 

 

II. Notice: This blog is a bit all over the place, but I hope you can keep up with my ADD. 

III. Background
I graduated from Louisiana Tech University in November 2012. I never thought I'd get there. I had it mostly figured out, too. Find a job. That was my biggest plan. Find a job for a year and then apply to grad school and continue toward a successful career from there.
By late December all motivation and future plans had altered. Significantly. I was getting no where closer to a job that didn't involve slingin' dishes and coming home with cash.
I needed change. A lot of it. And I've been looking for it ever since.
The only thing I promised myself in all that time was I would be selfish and never say no to myself like I'd done for so long. So far I haven't. And although I've nearly reached an end to this journey, I've yet to say no. I realize there are some people I've hurt along the way.
I've always been the optimist. The friend friends seek for advice and motivation. I've always been able to tell others the things I cannot tell myself. And even through the distance, I've done my best to be there.
I pride myself on being confident. Not physically necessarily, but in what I say or do. Anything said is a choice and any action taken is a choice.
There are countless words spoken and actions taken in the past three years I should regret. However, throughout this time is when I came to realize, "everything happens for a reason."
If any one of those past choices had been different I'm not certain I'd be sittin' on a bus in Beijing, China at this moment.
I encourage and support a proactive lifestyle. The fearless kind.
When I was home I visited family in Alabama and commented on a discussion that I was afraid of heights. My aunt was surprised and curious how I could fear anything. I knew what she meant because I'm a wanderer.
Just because I do things and make moves others find frightening doesn't mean I'm fearless. I'm flattered at the thought but I live in fear daily (about a random culmination of things).
Through it all I've become a new person. A happier person. There is a lot of 2012 Amie left, but 2015 Amie has a different attitude and perspective on life. I suppose I'm just grown up Amie now as opposed to naive, college Amie. Maybe no one ever really finds who they are or what they are supposed to do, but at least I won't have regrets.
I know there are things to be ashamed of. And had you told 1990-2012 Amie what I'd do, I'd called you crazy. Now there are things I'll roll over in my own grave for, but those choices brought me here. That may not be your belief system, but it is mine and it does wonders for my sleep. 
I've embraced the fact that I'm young, wild and free. I've learned to embrace the fact that my vocabulary could make a sailor blush, that my decisions frighten my family, that my mouth may get me shot some day.
Most of all, I've embraced that my actions are done in a childlike fashion. While my friends are having children, I'm still buying coloring books for myself. While everyone is getting married, I find comfort in a Netflix marathon of One Tree Hill. While my friends are buying homes and cars, I'm buying a $30 train ticket to the middle of nowhere. Many  people my age are concerned with their "adult" demeanor, meanwhile, I still scream "puppy!" or "kitty!" every time I see a critter, accompanied by a hop, skip or jump.  
If I never did anything right in life, I'll at least die saying I've remained maybe idiotic, but myself, and I love that person. Finally!

2012 Amie

2012 Amie

IV. Today 
Since returning to China for my second year nearly two months ago, I haven't been in the same mindset. I've also been franticly busy between work, tutoring and moving. All is well, it's just a bit of adjusting all over again. I'd grown comfortable with the life I had in China before visiting home in May. 
Lately, I've been debating my level of selfishness. As a friend, and more so as a daughter/family member. (Again, I have no regrets, but I still have a conscience).
In China, you all know my best friend and roomie, Gurpreet. We split ways this year and are both having trouble adjusting to the distance. A distance that is only about 30 minutes via the subway. We've become each other's sole leaner here. We rely on each other for knowledge, support and friendship. He is my family here, and I his. My mom checks up on him, just as she does with me. 
This week we had a sleepover accompanied by a couple bottles of wine to hash out the one week we've been apart. In conversation I discussed the recent feelings I've come to. 
I unintentionally hurt myriads of people. Men from fear. Friends from fear. And family, from, you guessed it, fear. 
For the first time in my life, I am relieved from the past I thought would always haunt me. For once I've been able to think with my heart again and not my head. For once I was happy at home. And for once I'm making future decisions that are less temporary. 

V. Mizpah
Now, lately I'm not much on religion as far as daily prayers and Bible studies, however, my mission in China was eat, pray and love, in a soul searching fashion. Which I've done quite well at. 
I came across a quote on Pinterest describing Mizpah as the bond between people separated by distance. So, I researched it a bit more. 
By biblical definition, Mizpah, means "look out." It's a Hebrew word which translates to "watchtower." Also, Mizpeh can be found throughout the Bible as a city name. (The distinction is apparently a bit blurry.)
Basically, somewhere in Genesis, Jacob and a guy named Laban made a covenant pact and built a stone monument (mizpeh) as a meeting ground between their locations. 
Later in the Bible, somewhere in the Old Testament between Joshua and 1Samuel, this Mizpeh, earlier created by Jacob and Laban, became a central religious meeting ground or something for Israel. Here, these people renewed their religious vows and rededicated to their faith so to speak. 
I don't think I've failed my friends yet, but this blog should serve as a mizpeh to you all. Reinforcing the fact I need each and every one of you, distance or no distance. 

VI. Mizpah, Part II
Definition: The deep emotional bond between people, especially those separated by distance or death.
Bob, as you've already read, is a gem of a friend. Here is where his inspiration for the blog comes to light. He and I communicate daily. Sometimes it's one o' clock in the morning his time, sometimes the reverse. Regardless, we work damn hard on our friendship. Same with all of my other American posse. 
Bob named the time difference the GAP. When signing off, we say, "Another win for the GAP." We coined, "mornight" for our greeting since it's always morning and night on one end or the other.  
As I mentioned in a previous blog dedicated to my friends, I single-handedly couldn't have picked a better gang. In another blog, I wrote about the struggles of living overseas, and how life is not a vacation simply because I live abroad. If it weren't for my friends and family, here or there, I'd probably find a corner, curl into a ball and die. 
I bitch about missing them on the bad days, but they've got the hard part. Especially my family. I never go to sleep at night wondering if my daughter is OK. I think the easiest part for my parents may be that during their day I'm sleeping, so they at least know I'm safe then. I never worry about their whereabouts, because I know the territory they reside in. Do I miss them? Like hell. Everyday. Some days more than others. Each day separated by distance only offers more love and admiration for my friends and family. 
The random voice messages from my dad to tell me he's going fishing after a long week at work. The videos from my mom of my dog and cats. The constant WeChats from friends I wake up to in the mornings. The Skypes, FaceTimes and video calls. The random tags on social media form others just letting me know they're thinking of me. You have no idea what five words or less from home can mean on any given day away.
I'll miss more things with my friends and family. That's life. I'm learning to deal with it through writing, but I don't think it'll ever get easier. 
In recent days I've been contemplating this fact: it was hard as hell to leave, but the harder part seems to be coming home. The bond I have between my family and friends is mizpah. But now that I've lived so many lives, with so many people from around the world, even when I return home, there will always be mizpah...

"The Journey Is The Destination"

I've been tryng to find websbites, magazines, blogs, anyone who will publish something I have written about traveling. No such luck. So far all they want is something about the fashion of that country or city, the hot spots to eat, the places to visit that are on any travel site possible.
That is not what traveling is about.
I could write articles about all of those things. It may interest 20 people. Everyone's interests are different. There are so many reasons to travel. And so many kinds of people who embrace it.
To me, the whole point of traveling is getting lost because that's when you find the best things.
So ask me to write a real article and that's what I'd tell you, get lost... As hell!
It's not an adventure until you're lost. My tour guide in Europe specifically told us not to overthink directions and maps, but to just go. (In numbers of course so we'd at least have company).
Sure, research the top restaurants and top places to see, but remember those have all been visited too often, and are shaped to please tourists and outsiders (I learned this when I went to the Stone Forest in the Yunnan Province).
If you go abroad, you should seriously attempt the not-so-sculpted places for eating, anyway. If they know you're coming, they change their authenticity to what tourists like or expect. This happens far too frequently.
I'd tell you to go to the Italian bistro I stumbled upon. The one down the third alley just past the Duomo in Florence. You'll pass a wall with dollars everywhere (don't ask). It's on your left. And when you think you've gone too far, you're just about there.
My dad has this theory about mom and pop joints in small towns. He says they have the best food because the grease is good and built up from the year's of business. Sounds gross, but mom & pop's are the best, right? My dad is also on the search for the world's best burger, and he's found it a few times. When we travel anywhere, we never eat Chili's, Burger King or other franchised joints. We always stop at a a log cabin building off a dirt road called Bob's Burgers, or something along those lines. Seldom are we disappointed.
This is kind of what I do when traveling. I suppose that's a habit inherited from my raising. Even when I first came to China, knowing I didn't eat Chinese food. I didn't eat McDonald's or Pizza Hut every day. I may have stuck to noodles and rice for a while, but I forced myself to be authentic.
In New York City, in Little Italy, I'd tell you to find the Italian restaurant with a handsome waiter named Giovanni with the most beautiful olive green eyes because that places gives you the first glass of wine free and the bread is delightful.
The Internet would tell you to try Lombardi's (which I have and it's delicious) but the Internet is often going to reference you to the "quality" places, as opposed to the cozy places. Obviously if you are a food junkie, you'll try the place flashing, "award-wining pizza," but that doesn't mean it's the best pizza. Ya dig?
Besides, just because I like a restaurant or place doesn't mean you will. I'll put the suggestion out there and I'll share my stories because people love stories, but what is great for one person isn't necessarily great for the other. Seriously... I like this that and the other. Do you? Of course not!

Aside from getting lost, the second thing I can say to you is, "you can't get lost if you don't know where you're going."
Plan your trip as thoroughly as possible, for time and money management purposes, but when it doesn't work out, take a breath and enjoy the results. You're still away from work, and if you're lucky, the kids, so make the best of whatever situation you're presented with.
I may not be able to tell you the best places to eat and shop because as a 20-something-year-old I obviously travel on a budget, but I can give you some common sense type advice and tips (in no particular order).
1. If you're in a country that doesn't speak your native language, you should always carry your hotel or hostel address with you, pointing is the same in any language. On paper because phones die and that picture won't be handy then. 
2. Where words fail, it's amazing how much understandable communication can be achieved with hand gestures. Be elaborate when speaking. Also, it's a language barrier, not a hearing problem. Don't yell at people to make your point - you look foolish.
3. If you're American, remember you're not in America. What I mean is, not every big city is dangerous. Do your research prior to visiting and avoid paranoia.
4. Don't bother ensuring you have international data. You can contact whomever once you've acquired wifi. 
5. Actually, just turn your phone off. If you want to use it for photos and music like I do, keep it on airplane mode to keep the battery up and contact down. 
6. WATER
7. Backpacks, not purses. Side shoulder bags for women are great if you are just strolling and don't need more than a wallet. 
8. Stay in a hostel. You don't need five-star service. Hostels have wifi, too. Bunk with strangers. It can be entertaining and you can meet friends or people to split tour costs with. 
9. Talk to people. Everyone has a story. Find it. Some may inspire you further. 
10. The most important of all. Open your senses. Listen to the sounds. The traffic if it's a metropolis. The waves if it's the beach. The languages if it's a foreign land. With your eyes look at the differences. Not the skin color or clothes people are wearing. I mean their demeanors. The happiness found in children playing with empty water bottles in villages. They see fun where we'd normally see garbage and filth. Open your nose to the smells. Remember them well. We can witness many things if we just look past the norm we're used to. 

If I sat here long enough I could give you 20 or 30 more tips and thoughts on travel, but you should get out there and find your own. Be cautious, yet bold. Be curious, yet smart. Just do it and enjoy it.  

Here are a few photos with captions of explanation  from some of my most memorable uses of the senses from my travels...

A family playing with their daughter on the beach of the Pacific Ocean in Beidaihe, China. 

When you're walking in foreign territory, be sure to look in all directions. Especially up. This will always remain one of my most favorite pictures. It's just nostalgic I guess... (Amsterdam, Netherlands)

A bit odd I know, but every place I go, when I smell manure, farm animals or hay it always puts me in a happy place. I wasn't raised on a farm, but anyone from the South is familiar with the smells of agriculture. It's the same in any country so far. (Amsterdam, Netherlands) 

Watching this guy engrave a wallet for my dad, I will never forget the strong aroma of leather in this shop (Florence, Italy). 

My biggest memory of the Notre Dame was sitting in the bleachers out front listening to his performance. He sang, "Don't Worry, Be Happy." I don't think a more fitting song could've ever been played at a more appropriate time. (Paris, France)

Dachau Concentration Camp: Dachau, Germany. I forced myself through each written piece in the museum. I forced myself into the barracks. I spent the bus ride home reflecting on the history this hell contains. I shed tears. This is the most emotional place I've ever visited. Although a major tourist attraction, it holds it's purpose and it isn't maintained to please the public. It's there to show history and tell stories.  

I sat on this levee with my feet dangling eating a piece of strawberry pie I'd bought at a bistro. For once I didn't have my headphones in and I distinctly remember the cooing of pigeons. (Stone Bridge, Regensburg, Germany)





Christmas is my mom's favorite holiday. We watch Home Alone 2 religiously as a family. I remember being sick to my stomach and homesick missing my first Christmas in 23 years.  (Rockefeller Center, NY, NY)

Someone will always be around with ponchos in case of rain. But don't worry, rain isn't a game changer. Just a temperature changer. :) (Xingping, China. Guangxi Province). 

She was just jumping over the rope by herself while her mom was holding down the shop.  (Yunnan Province, China).

A view, a moment and a day like this I will never be able to put into words, but it will forever be etched in my memory.  (Yuanyang County, Honghe, China)

We met the Israeli guys on the night bus into this town. The fog altered our plans so we crashed at their hostel. We just talked a lot. Oh, and had the most amazing day together touring the rice terraces for a grand total of 80 yuan. (Yuanyang County, Honghe, China).

This was one of my favorite moments because in every country, in any culture, old ladies will always gossip and sit around :) (Ancient Town of Dali, China. Yunnan Province)

The air smelled like chocolate because there were chocolate factories surrounding our bike tour route. (Amsterdam, Netherlands).

In closing I would like to say I realize various types of people write travel articles and various types of people travel. Each individual is different. And when it comes to travel, we are certainly not all the same.

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly: A Chronicle of Polluted Days in China

Sometime in late March...
I was scrolling through my notes app on my phone a few months back. Then later that day I scrolled my draft list on my blog and realized I have several unfinished stories of the pollution. How it differs from day to day and more than that, from morning to night.
The pollution can affect your entire day. It's like an environmental mood ring. 600% means off the charts. Seriously, the scale goes to 500, but Beijing experienced some 600-something days in winter.  So 400-300 percent is extremely gloomy. 200% means you're so-so because you know it could be worse. And 100% means you're pissed if you have to work because it's as nice as it can get in China compared to the 500% days. And when it's less than 100%, meaning not visible, you call in sick or thank your lucky stars if it's your day off.
The only positive I have found from the pollution is it makes you less lazy. Meaning if it's your lazy Sunday and it's sunny, you force yourself outside because you'd only beat yourself up for it later if you wasted fresh air and sunshine. Winter, summer, spring or fall.
Also, living in smog city has made me more health-conscious. Because I live in a death bubble I consider healthier options for eating and exercising. In my mind it's a balancing factor.
Here is a compilation of some thoughts, feelings and ideas I've had on certain days in regards to the lethal, pm2.5.

Sunday, April 5, 2015
It's the only place where silence is remotely achieved. In a city of 25 million and counting, solitude is hard to come by. Even in your own home. There is a sitting bay in my window. A lavender pillow permanently rests their as my cushion. This is where I come to be. Be alone. Be creative. Or simply be. At night I can see the entirety of my neighborhood, Shuangjing, lit up from towering building to towering building; this is only to the left and front. On the right I can see a large portion of our neighbors in Dawanglu. There is mostly hotels and businesses.
This is only on clear nights when the pollution has subsided. By subsided I mean the day was extremely windy and we got lucky that the pollution blew away for a day, possibly two.
My best friend in Beijing, a Beijinger, born and raised, once said, "I feel bad sometimes when there is no pollution because that means some other city has to be polluted for the day."
I laughed and called her crazy then told her, "f*&% them! It's polluted 250 days of the year here. They'll survive. We deserve fresh air, too."
Everyone in China knows about the recent documentary, "Under The Dome," ((Chinese: 穹顶之下; pinyin: qióngdǐng zhī xià)), by Chai Jing. You also may have guessed by now the documentary was blocked by the Chinese government. Fortunately, the people of China, have been going around the blocked sites for years, and us foreigners have VPNs to access whatever is blocked by government.
The documentary is absolutely fantastic and brilliant! It's about 60 minutes and you can find it on YouTube with perfect English subtitles. I highly recommend it, but that's not what this story is about (just an idea sparker).
According to some statistics, 33% of all cigarettes smoked yearly are lit up in China. The number of smoker's in China is estimated at about 300 million, which is the United States' population. Here are some other fun facts about smoking in China. 
Without fact checking I would say at least 80% of the population smokes in China. This includes all the foreigners, too. It's actually a joke among westerners that many begin smoking while in China.I was among that joke my first six months here. Regardless, it's contributing to the already massive air pollution problem. 
In Jing's documentary there is a clip of a woman having spots on her lungs removed from cancer. She assures the doctor she has never smoked. This is where the documentary is sharing facts about pollution causing cancer. The woman in the documentary had lived in China all her life. (Yes, I'm aware second hand smoke can cause it, too). The point is that the documentary showed the inside of a human's lungs nearly all black whom had never smoked a cigarette in her life! After watching this documentary I wasn't so much as tempted to smoke in China ever again. 
If I'm going to live in China for two years and continue smoking I might as well pick out my headstone. My body has already taken a toll from this country. It's an extremely dry climate in the winter and extremely humid in the summer. I went to the hospital for the first time in my life since birth while living here. Cause: dehydration. I drink roughly six liters of water a day. More than the needed amount.
Secondly, I continue to attempt a healthy lifestyle by running even if the pollution isn't clear, because to me, this place isn't any cleaner if I can or can't see the pollution.

February 3, 2015
When the pollution comes in at 500% or higher. The level where you can't see past the first 150 feet behind, or in front of you. When the skyscrapers that cover this giant city simply disappear... That's when it's like living in a ghost town that miraculously escaped the end of the world.

Monday, April 13, 2015
Today seems like spring has finally arrived! The sky is as pollution-free as can be in Beijing. The sun is shining so the air is a warm 65 degrees. The wind is calm enough to be pleasant but strong enough to push off the pollution for a day or two.
The air is polluted with something other than dirt today. Tiny puffs of daffodil-looking dust particles float through the air like snow. I pretend they are daffodils and see the "wishes" glisten in the sunshine that bring hope of warmer and cleaner days.

Wednesday, April 15, 2015
Transitioned back to smog city. I haven't left the bed and my window has remained closed. I can see the ''smog'' drawing nearer. At 5 o' clock in the evening I am going to tutor some students. When I arrive in the area and step off the bus the wind has picked up significantly and dust is stirring on the ground. By the time I'm inside of the tutor building, I looked out the window and the sky was gone and the street below only visible where lights tried to shine. A 'sand storm' had taken over the city. It last about two hours.

April 23, 2015
I'm sitting on bus 806 headed west. It's a city bus in Beijing, China. I'm coming from the fifth ring road. The outskirts if you will. In my future I can see downtown; Dawnaglu and Guamo. Their skyscrapers are the only thing visible through the pollution. And really they aren't visible, merely silhouettes. Their curtain is the smog.
Today is exceptionally sunny and warm. The early morning was fairly clear and pleasant. Just three hours inside and when I came back outside, the pollution had slowly drifted back into the city.
I think the pollution is always here, but sometimes it's a bubble rather than a sheet. When it's a bubble we can't see it inside of our neighborhood. But like today, if we can look ahead from a distance, and at elevation, we can see that blanket of smog we so often disregard because we've grown so accustomed to it.
The view of skyscrapers just before the silhouetted ones aren't much clearer. It's like looking at a faded photograph from the '70s. You know the coloring then; more advanced than black and white but still very golden-brown around the edges.

June 26, 2015
It's raining cats and dogs outside. No one should ever complain about rain here for two reasons. Number one, in an incredibly dry climate, it adds much needed moisture. Secondly, when it rains in China that means there is a 90% chance the sky will be blue and the sun will shine the following day.

June 28, 2015
The rain didn't bring blue skies. In fact, I think it made it worse. The entire world surrounding me is gray and meek. If I were to walk 30 feet away, I feel I'd disappear into the fog. The air is so thick from the pressure. I walked outside my apartment and before I'd walked 500 yards, I was winded. I came back from America one month ago and have been fighting a cough ever since. Today I felt the pressure in my lungs and the struggle to breathe. Fuck this.

June 28th vs. June 29

July 1, 2015
I'm on bus 806 headed north... again. I take this bus home every Wednesday after a tutoring class. I have ridden this route roughly 12 Wednesdays. On April 23, I wrote about the pollution bubble. Today I write coming in after dark. The sky is violet and an occasional twinkle of a star can be seen throughout the atmosphere.
The buildings are lit for miles and untouched by the pollution. It's clear. It finally rained enough to lower the pressure that's been sticking around in the air.
On my way to tutoring I saw the first, and probably only rainbow I'll ever see in Beijing. I quickly snapped a shot and continued crossing through traffic.
When the weather is good, you can always see others snapping photos of the sky like they've never seen a cloud so white or a sly so blue. They are probably all keeping their own documentation of the good, the bad and the ugly.
Since living in Beijing I've learned to appreciate a beautiful sunny day more. When I came back from Louisiana last month I realized I had about 15 photos of the sky throughout my photo album. I probably took them to brag to my Chinese friends or something. 

July 1, 2015: 5:15 p.m.

June 2, 2015

From my bedroom window: January, 29, 2015