FedUp :)

This is not a post so you can freely express some 'Murican opinion, but a post to let you know how lucky you all are. Please refrain from a plethora of rude comments about communism v. democracy v. capitalism v. republics or whatever your preference is. I love China, honestly. As a foreigner, you don't realize so many of the restrictions because many of us are privileged here and treated differently, so that don’t always affect us. If you know me you know I have zero patience, especially when it comes to getting things accomplished. When you don't speak the language, it's damn near impossible to even pay your light bill. Each month we fill up our electric, gas and water on a debit card at the convenience store downstairs from our apartment. Then we have to call the landlord to insert it in a wall for us and make sure it works. 

You all know mommy dearest has sent me a package of assorted belongings and treasures. I’ve been waiting for said package all week. When I call FedEx the only English they can spit out is, “Do you have a Chinese friend with you?”

I say no, (in Chinese.) They continue with Chinese talk and I just continue saying, “I don’t know,” and “I don’t understand” (also in Chinese.)

Living abroad is a real struggle for multiple reasons. I am used to being the one to help others when I can. I’m used to doing things on my own. Sure I still call my parents to ask them what to do and how to do it first, but then I go and do it. My parents taught me independence at a young age and I’ve been taking pride in it ever since. 

In China, I can’t even pay rent on my own. I have to transfer money from my account into the landlords, but the ATM is in Chinese so I have to bring Jasmine with me. People who don’t work with fellow, English-speaking Chinese or have close Chinese friends, I pity you. I honestly don’t know how they do it. Even the foreigner friends I have who’ve lived here for months, some for years, don’t always have the answers. 

I feel defenseless 90 percent of the time. I can’t change the language on my cell phone without the help of a Chinese friend. To say I’m lucky is an understatement.

I get on quite well in China, but it’s only because of the Chinese family I’ve made here. They have all taken me under their wing at some point: helping me to fill the gas and electric card, buy an outlet adapter, order food, find locations, and the list is endless (literally). These people are my family and they do it willingly. There is no, “I’ll help you if you help me.” I mean there is, but it’s an unspoken agreement. It’s a general respect. Karma exists here as much as it ever did for me. 

Last week I finally got a new smart phone, which I managed to drop in water last night. I’ve been trying to send money to the States for months, now that I’ve finally figured it out, the banks are closed for a week thanks to APEC. And, last but not least, said package I’ve been trying to acquire for a week I’m now told I can’t obtain until a sample of my DNA, my blood type, a copy of my flight agenda to China and passport have been delivered to FedEx. The DNA and blood sample bit is obviously an exaggeration that stems from the frustration I’ve endured these last few days. 

My favorite co-worker, Kelly, volunteers to call FedEx and sort all of this business for me. She’s on the phone and filling out documents in Chinese for me all day as I sit defenseless waiting to do something as measly as sign my signature on the bottom-left corner of the documents. 

Finally, we are scanning documents and getting ready to send the email and I told her just do whatever option is easier so I can get on with the day. I am not even interested in receiving the package at this point. Sidenote: the major hold up is that there are too many clothes in the package. Customs requires specific lists of all items in a package with the price of said items to avoid people getting things shipped here for resale. Mind you I’m at least five sizes larger than the largest of Chinese women so there is no chance of my clothes being resold for any sort of profit. But, customs is customs. 

Kelly tells me, “it’s a small thing,” when I thanked her for the thousandth time for helping me. She said, “I hate to see you upset about this. It happens to everyone.” I told her I don’t understand why everything in China has to be SOOOOO hard and I don’t know how she does it.

“I grew up with this. I’m used to it,” she replied without a care in a world.

Don’t I feel like an ass. 

So, I wrote all of this to say that every time I get bummed here I have to remind myself that I didn’t grow up here and I chose to have less freedoms and even in a country with far less freedoms, I still don’t have it as bad as most do here. The world is shit and it isn’t fair. Just maybe we all need to realize there is always someone who has a less fair life than we do somewhere out there. As cliche as that all sounds.