This short blog is for my Daddy. It is personal and I want him to know no matter how near or far I am from him, he is always on my mind and in my heart. I am who I am today because of him.
The bond of love between a father and a daughter is harder for me to describe than the word "love" itself. It never fades or falters. There is something fragile about being responsible for someone else's life, especially when in Daddy's eyes, that somebody is still a five-year-old girl.
My friends are all getting hitched and having children of their own and that scares the hell out of me for two reasons.
1. Because I still need taking care of myself. so there is no way I could be responsible for any other living being.
2. Because I fear I'll never be the type of parent mine were to me.
People always say a girl will marry her father. When you are a young girl it seems dad is the only option and you envy mommy for marrying daddy first. When you are a teenager it just seems strange, but as you grow older the saying begins to make sense.
As women, we spend our lives searching for Prince Charming. Disney gets us started on that journey by age three. My search for Prince Charming has ended. Then again, it never really began. Why search for a Prince when I already have a King?
If you aren't close with your father, or have daddy issues, then this tidbit of lovey dovey isn't for you. However, if your daddy is your lifeline, then stay tuned. You may appreciate the bond my father and I share.
My dad was the first man I ever loved. It happened so suddenly some 24 years ago. From crawling to bicycles to my first car, it was always Daddy who taught me. No one bandages a scrapped knee like Dad and no one tells you to try again like a dad.
It only makes sense that I compare every man I romantically encounter to my dad. He's quite a lot to live up to so I sympathize for my future partner. Sure I've loved other men, but at some point the other ones have let me down or just didn't meet the standard. Daddy on the other hand has never, not once, let me down.
From my father I inherited all of his best qualities and some odd quirks. I have my father's charm. He is quiet on the surface sometimes but once you get him talking he is a riot. , I have my father's sense of humor, cause which can sometimes lead to situations where I put my foot in my mouth. I have my father's height and his nasty habit of nail biting. We hate a fair share of all vegetables, yet my dad will eat beets from a jar like I eat black olives straight from the can (two veggies many hate.) I have my father's passion for music and it is the bond I believe makes us strongest. I could go on for hours about what I love most about myself thanks to my daddy, but I'll move on to the point.
From my father I inherited all of his best qualities and some odd quirks. I have my father's charm. He is quiet on the surface sometimes but once you get him talking he is a riot. , I have my father's sense of humor, cause which can sometimes lead to situations where I put my foot in my mouth. I have my father's height and his nasty habit of nail biting. We hate a fair share of all vegetables, yet my dad will eat beets from a jar like I eat black olives straight from the can (two veggies many hate.) I have my father's passion for music and it is the bond I believe makes us strongest. I could go on for hours about what I love most about myself thanks to my daddy, but I'll move on to the point.
Today is my Daddy's birthday. This makes the second year in a row that I've been on the other side of the world for my father's birthday. Last year Europe, this year China. Next year, who knows three ?
My dads three favorite things are The Eagles, The Dallas Cowboys and fishing. For my daddy I'm writing him a birthday letter with a ton of Eagles song lyrics. This is my way of joining his love of the Eagles and my creative writing. Please note the lyrics obviously won't have the same meaning in my letter as they do in the songs. For those who are not an avid fan and aware of the power of an Eagles song, I have italicized the lyrics.
This one's for you Pops! :)
Daddy,
I'm standin' on a corner between bliss and heartache. In this world we all become prisoner's of our own device. Mine is travel and escape. It takes a certain kind of fool to branch out from the home they know in search of another world. And I'm already standing on the ground you have laid for me. To me, home is where the soul grows still and comfortable. You know I love home and it is always with me. But, you know I am looking for something more in this life and in myself. So, home for me is a place you can check out any time you like, but you can never leave it.
You already know I don't want to just be working on the dreams I planned to try, I want to take another shot of courage and chase those dreams. This 'ol world still looks the same and I'm already gone and I'm feelin' strong. I will sing this victory song and make you proud. Rumor has it, you can make it if you try. You've just gotta lay it on the line and everything will be fine. And if it isn't, then I'll just have to get over it.
You told me if I hate it here (home) then leave. So, in a New York minute I was gone. First to New York, now China. You knew what that felt like and that's why you left California. It gets hard being the new kid in town somedays, but I know I have support from you. If I were with you now you'd say, "everybody loves you so don't let them down." I'm not afraid to take chances knowing you have my back. Sooner or later we all have to die and I know I'll die happily with no regrets. That's a stone cold fact.
I'm living life in the fast lane and missing you more each day. I'm just a victim of love kept together by the strength you give me. With the distance, I'm coming apart at the seams and I know you were trying to play it tough so I could be wrong, but I'm not when I say I know that you miss me as much, if not more. We may have a heartache tonight but tomorrow we will hide our fear and sorrow.
I'm going back in time and it's a sweet dream when I picture being home with you on the lake or river fishing. You know we always had each other when we were bonding over Lunchables and Gatorade on the water. I hope your day brings you a peaceful easy feeling and you eat lots of cake and ice cream. Thank you for everything you have ever done and everything I know you will do in the future. I'm sending you the best of my love and hoping it reaches you quickly. I hope you've enjoyed the corny spin I put on your birthday letter. Just know you'll always be my man and that love will keep us alive.
xoxo
-Ames :)
You told me if I hate it here (home) then leave. So, in a New York minute I was gone. First to New York, now China. You knew what that felt like and that's why you left California. It gets hard being the new kid in town somedays, but I know I have support from you. If I were with you now you'd say, "everybody loves you so don't let them down." I'm not afraid to take chances knowing you have my back. Sooner or later we all have to die and I know I'll die happily with no regrets. That's a stone cold fact.
I'm living life in the fast lane and missing you more each day. I'm just a victim of love kept together by the strength you give me. With the distance, I'm coming apart at the seams and I know you were trying to play it tough so I could be wrong, but I'm not when I say I know that you miss me as much, if not more. We may have a heartache tonight but tomorrow we will hide our fear and sorrow.
I'm going back in time and it's a sweet dream when I picture being home with you on the lake or river fishing. You know we always had each other when we were bonding over Lunchables and Gatorade on the water. I hope your day brings you a peaceful easy feeling and you eat lots of cake and ice cream. Thank you for everything you have ever done and everything I know you will do in the future. I'm sending you the best of my love and hoping it reaches you quickly. I hope you've enjoyed the corny spin I put on your birthday letter. Just know you'll always be my man and that love will keep us alive.
xoxo
-Ames :)
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